Creeping - Order of Snakes (2011)

Punky black metal drenched in doom. This rocks and rolls at a blistering groovy pace.

Order of Snakes

Trollfest - En Kvest for Den Hellige Gral (2011)

"Warm black metal. Black metal for those who live on the Brazilian beaches." These videos will explain everything that needs to be said.

TROLL!

Irepress - Sol Eye Sea I (2009)

This is beautiful, like looking right into the eye of a tornado. Instrumental post-metal with a plethora of genres to incorporate at their disposal. And that they do just that, rapidly, without warning. At one moment you are listening to a jazz section, suddenly your ears blink, and the song is ripping into a sludgy soup of melodic interludes.

That artwork is certainly no slouch either, created by illustrator Chad Lenjer. I had a chit-chat with this talented bloke just after the release of this album. He assured me that this album was no mistake, and this 5-piece from Massachusetts were the most down to earth dudes he ever worked for.

I don't want to sit here trying to rack my brain for ways to describe this sound, its pretty unique and excellently executed. Listen and interpret it however you choose. The use of the sound-clips from The Goonies puts a smile on my face.


Goonies Never Say Die!

Martriden - Encounter The Monolith (2010)

 

This is what it would sound like if the world imploded.

Encounter.

Nostromo - Ecce Lex (2002)

 

I am going to let this YouTube clip sum-up this feral onslaught.

If you aren't convinced after that, your ears have been compromised.

I am convinced.

Primordial - Redemption At The Puritans Hand (2011)

Firstly, I love the production on this one. The drums have that powerful yet natural resonance frequency to them (?), the guitars tones are a tad muffled in the ensuing chaos, but in a good black fucking metal way. Alan A. on vocals, enough said. All bundled up in the Irish potato famine garb.

fuck piracy. support music.

KEN mode - Venerable (2011)

Forgiveness please, its been a while since I have posted and this will change...starting...(takes swig of Grolsch)...(takes bite out of cold pizza-pocket)...now!

K so fuck, this sounds like a lumberjack in a dense forest during a two week amphetamine bender. Abrasive metalcore that weaves in an out of intensity. C4 yourself.

Neverable

Discordance Axis - The Inalienable Dreamless (2000)

I dare you to look at that album cover and decide for yourself what this may sound like. Nevermind, you will be wrong anyways. I will give you a hint, it is grind that sounds like a newborn kitten being forced down a garburator.

This is not Tiësto

Black Breath - Heavy Breathing (2010)

 

This is crossover done to fucking near perfection. Early death metal influence rears its head as well as that patented sound by producer and guitarist of Converge Kurt Ballou. Predominant guitar tones caked with a grimy distortion and a balls to the wall sound.

Make sure no midgets are in the room with you while you give this a spin, because I promise you, you will want to dropkick them in the dick. Every song can stand on its own two feet while windmilling you in the face. Listen for yourself.

Black Breath fuck

De Magia Veterum - The Divine Antithesis (2011)

Heres what you do, you download this monstrosity of an album, get someone you know who doesn't really listen to anything extreme, sit them in front of the song 'The Heavens', and write down their response to it in the comments section. It's fun, fucking do it!

This is black metal that is practically drowned out by thick atmosphere, noise and unconventional instrumental chaos. It is a one man project by "M" (Also the man behind Gnaw Their Tongues), and if you were wondering what somebody who makes music like this looks like, then here you go:

He seems pretty down to earth if you ask me...wait is that plastic wrap around his head?

Upside down Heaven

Heljareyga - Heljareyga (2010)

Heljareyga, a side project from Heri Joensen of Týr! This is progressive folk metal. Quite simply, if you like Týr you will like this as well. Though it isn't a copycat, it still bears its own sound and does so very well.

Mediafire

Vomit The Soul - Apostles of Inexpression

Despite the gnarly illustration, something about that album cover tells me I am not going to be impressed with what I hear. For some reason I think of generic deathcore cabbage patch kids slam whenever I look at that. What the fuck do I know afterall? I was completely wrong.

Vomit The Soul of Italy have created a sound that is repulsive and of course brutal. I'm sure if someone vomited out a soul, it would bear a resemblance in sound, I would hope so anyway. The production is spot on and every instrument can be heard quite clearly and this makes baby Jesus smile.

Dogma

The Kill Decibel - Bled Dry (2004)

This is how it's done, The Kill Decibel have basically man-handled its way into people ears. I have seen these guys live multiple times, and each time they managed to up the intensity in the room x1000. This is how I like my hardcore. Don't act hard, be hard!

Bled Dry

Between The Buried And Me - The Parallax Hypersleep Dialogues (2011)

Between the Buried and Me, a band that needs no introduction...but is going to fucking get one anyway. Okay so, you know when like, girls try to listen to a heavy band, but really they only like the slow and steady sing-along parts? I think that is pretty opposite of rad. Albeit, some guys do it as well, but they probably are devoid of a penis.

Misogynistic banter aside, this album by the prolific beasts of progressive metal is no real disappointment. Unless sheer kick-assery was not what you were looking for. 3 mammoth tracks encompass the entirety of the album, which lends us the hint that:

With BTBAM becoming increasingly more progressive in sound, they increase song lengths and reduce tracks. It's science! The next album will most likely have only one song spanning for an entire hour. The next album after that will actually have -2 songs, which means they will erase 2 BTBAM songs of their choice from existence completely!

My 'Holy fuck!' moment on this CD was on the song "Augment of Rebirth" at 6:30-8:15.

BTBAM

Arthemis - The Damned Ship (2001)

Drums that share the same sound frequency and consistency of a herd of galloping bison. Riffs catchier than a Donkey Kong Country song. Oh yeah, and vocals done by Alessio Garavello of Power Quest. His voice sounds like an ancient unicorns...if the unicorn was a man. Power metal in all of its glory, dawning shiny armor and dragon punching!

The Damned Ship

Shai Hulud - That Within Blood Ill-Tempered (2003)

"Brothers and sisters, the time has come for each and everyone of you to decide, whether you are going to be the problem or you are going to be the solution!' Well actually, the time has come for each and everyone of you to decide whether you are going to download this link or not. I realize it is my duty to persuade you into doing so. So I will way this...

Holy motherfucking Jesus's god-damned shriveled dick nailed to a cross that is infested with termites! Here is what happens when you mix metal riffing, hardcore influence and an overall post-hardcore song structure with borderline pretentious yet misanthropic lyrics. Brimming, nay, overflowing with melodic passages and visceral presence.

"There is a time for fighting and there is a time for singing. Now you teach us to sing."

Oblomov - Mighty Cosmic Dances (2006)

...And now for something entirely different. Oblomov are clearly not purists, at least when it comes to black metal. Here is a release that floored me when I first heard it around '08, with its oddball approach and saxophone use. The song "Lost Between Emotions" quickly became my most played song, mainly due to the saxophone solo and one of my favorite endings to a song ever.

I don't intend to put this album on top of the black metal podium, but it is full of ingenious ideas in its rather outlandish approach to black metal. I bought this album through contacting the band, have never looked back since.

Mighty Cosmic

Six Dead Horses - Horn, Tusk, Antler (2009)

In spirit of the You Are Doomed Fest '11 I give you Six Dead Horses. Not the kind of dead horses you find in your bed when the mafia has marked you for death, but rather the kind that eats away at your ear canals for a solid 34 minutes. Brimming with wizard beard appreciation the sound is doomy, heavy, slow and subjected to experimentation under a fine microscope.

The band describes their sound as; "Mammoths stampeding through an earthquake fighting ancient bearded warriors on Harleys while listening to Sabbath and punching babies in the faces."

For this you will want to have your speakers at about a volume that just teeters on them blowing. Enjoy.

Horn, Tusk, Antler

You Are Doomed Fest '11

A buddy of mine over at Orlandooom has asked if I would make a post about an upcoming Doom/Sludge festival that will be held on April 23rd. I would of told him to go get eaten by a saber-tooth tiger had I not been into the festival he was promoting. Instead, I feel compelled to ask my new chum if he would let me couch surf at his place for a few days so I can go see this shit myself!

Fucking, Shroud Eater, Hollow Leg, Six Dead Horses and Junior Bruce. Give me a musically scientific equation as to how this can possibly not kick Mary Magdalene in her whorish mouth?

Click on the flyer to go to the last.fm for more details about this kick assery!

Cloudkicker

Cloudkicker, not only is it a name that made me giggle like a schoolgirl due to the picture it painted in my head, but it also hauls more ass than David Duchovny. Ben Sharp, the bloke behind this one man band is quite the dude, he works as hard as anyone out there if not harder and then offers the end result for free (or the option to donate whatever the listener feels right).

Every single EP and LP this man has released has been nothing short of prolific. Shit, does it sound like I am begging you to like this? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe fuck your mother. Here is said discography, enjoy!

As always, give what you can!

Beacons (2010)

 

A New Heavenly Body (2010)

Portmanteau (2009)

The Map Is Not The Territory (2009)

The Discovery (2008)

Gnaw Their Tongues - L'Arrivée De La Terne Mort Triomphante (2010)

This? This is a mindfuck. It goes in through your auditory meatus and my guess would be it comes out through an exorcism. One listen will render you clinically insane and on your way to becoming a serial killer. I am only being a slight bit facetious as this album conjures up thoughts and sounds of a very eerie magnitude indeed.

This unsettling release can be described as a juxtaposition between a variety of different elements such as; Drone, sludge, noise, experimental, ambient, classical, and layered throughout black metal. A production that shares the same murkiness as a fucking mud puddle, atmospherics that share the same haunt as Ed Gein's tool shed, and melodies that sound like a chainsaw lobotomy. I wonder if I can call this the black metal equivalent to Godspeed You Black Emperor without annoying the ironic hipster empire. Ill say it anyway.

Instead of going in depth about the pig fuckery that is this cesspool of musical incredulence (there is a 98.4% I made that word up.), I'll instead toss the download link your way.

Gnaw Their Ears

Carach Angren - Lammendam

Honestly, this has got to be ONE of the strongest debut's I have heard in the genre of symphonic black metal. I realize that is quite a statement, but I stand behind it 92.8%. Why am I so balls deep into this?
This shit it pitch black and it is a concept album based on the ghost of 'La Madame Blanche' who lived in a castle surrounded by a moat in a almost forgotten forest in the Netherlands. It's a real place and can still be visited today.

Influences can be heard, but Carach Angren successfully manage to create their own unique sound, filled with haunting atmospherics, eerie soundscapes and crushing black metal built around a strong theme. I could go on and on. But I'll spare you and spew the download link your way instead.

Lammendam

Cerebral Fix - Tower of Spite (1990)

Noticeably more gritty than other British thrash at the time, Cerebral Fix accomplished this through the unique gruff vocals and sinister riffs. Crusty thrash veterans will enjoy this one, but then chances are you already have it. If not, get it, and either like it or hate it. That is sort of how this blog works anyways.

Click me

Harms Way - No Gods, No Masters (2010)

Even if you consider yourself to be the most brutally dedicated shitstick Metal fan, sometimes you like something that contradicts your elitist metalhead perspective. Hardcore is something I have enjoyed for a lengthy portion of my life, and I am still finding new shit even if it doesn't always offer anything overly new or fresh. Sometimes it just makes me want to pop a can of spinach and stomp some fucking skulls around.

Harms Way offers no gimmicks or cheap tricks to their assault, they just take their instruments and basically beat you senseless for 15 minutes. Fuck yeah to the thrash influences and awesome sound-clips.

Harms Way

Odious Mortem - Cryptic Implosion (2007)

Doth thou haveth the audacity to questioneth my slight absence on my own music blog? One that I do for fun and no profit, other than the gratification of pointing out some brutal shit to some brutal dudes? Sitting in your faggot computer chair finger clicking free CD's judging me with your false sense of self-entitlement.

Oh man, you should of seen your faces, you must of thought I was a major dicksmith. Happy belated April fools, I thought of an elaborate plan of how I was going to make every Mediafire link, link to a series of meatspin videos, or how the blog had been under attack by a group of mutant refrigerator monsters. Instead...


have some awesome technical death metal.


Odious Mortem

Oathbreaker - Oathbreaker (2008)

Some bands do just about EVERYTHING right, Oathbreaker doesn't slip up fucking once on this onslaught of an EP. This is basically Belgium's Converge. Well no, fuck that, because that would be selling these guys short and they deserve their own recognition and praise. Female-fronted angry ass hardcore. Get it.

Pissed